Sometimes you come across a boss who you hate. And sadly the feeling may be mutual. They don’t like you. Or it looks that way. What are you going to do, especially if you can’t afford to quit.
1. Keep your enemies close is a great piece of advice.
Find out what the boss likes to do out of work. I have seen a marginal performer turn around his boss’s opinion of him because they could share their joint passion for sports – “did you see the Raiders last night?” Suddenly the boss had a buddy and was prepared to give the employee the benefit of the doubt. Interestingly, the boss was very hard on someone doing the same work, who was of equal skill level, but who was not a sports nut. Making your boss a “friend” is a good way to deal with the issue. But obviously, you need to be authentic about this. Being fake is manipulative. It may help you accomplish the goals but may not do much for your moral well-being and karma! You need to find things that you legitimately can be interested in and which your boss also likes.
2. Make allies. Whether you can make a friend of your boss or not, you still need to get yourself a team who supports you. Get allies above your boss and at his or her level. I knew a woman who was very frustrated with her boss who didn’t like her very much. She used some relationships she had already made with her boss’s peers and her boss’s boss to get her own way. She didn’t complain, but she just talked about her challenges and asked for some advice from these other people. Her boss was annoyed but he wanted to look good so he backed off.
3. Become your boss. Learn to be like him or her. Ask for their advice. Praise their suggestions. Flatter them so they reveal some of their secrets. Use their same words so they feel comfortable with you. Knowledge is powerful. By understanding what makes your boss tick, you can learn better how to please them, and learn how to beat them at their own game. You need to use these techniques to deal with your boss but also follow your own course of action and be be authentic with others. Gradually, you will learn how to move ahead, and even ahead of your boss.
